Annoyed At: Secret Hospital Floors

It annoys me when…

1, 2, 4? Wait, where's the 3rd floor?
1, 2, 4? Wait, where’s the 3rd floor?

Elevators skip floors. Not “skip” like they don’t stop there, but “skip” like they don’t even list the floor. I understand that hotels routinely “skip” the 13th floor and number what is actually floor 13 as floor 14. But I was recently at a hospital to see my newborn grandson. I got on the elevator and the floor buttons went from “2” to “4,” skipping “3.” What possible need could there be to skip the 3rd floor? I remembered distinctly from my view of the building as I walked up to the hospital that there was not a cushion of air between the 2nd and 4th floors where the 3rd floor should have been. Someone was hiding something here.

My natural tendency to suspect a conspiracy went into hyper-drive. Surely the hospital must be conducting some sort of sinister secret experiments on that “missing” 3rd floor. I happened onto the elevator again, this time sharing the car with a couple of hospital employees. I had to ask, “So, where’s the third floor?”

“Oh,” one of the employees responded slyly, “that’s just maintenance and such, so this elevator doesn’t stop there.” Obviously she was simply parroting the official line to keep suspicious members of the public like me from digging any further into the covert activity being perpetrated on the mysterious 3rd floor. But I will not be put off so easily. Further investigation is warranted. Keep watching this space for developments.

I'm not the first to suspect nefarious goings-on at a hospital
I’m not the first to suspect nefarious goings-on at a hospital

 

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